bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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