My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
