His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize