Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
