Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
