I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I think people are normalizing furries
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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