You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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