You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
