found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
