Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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