why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
