ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
