Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize