Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
