theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
