yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize