Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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