you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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