Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
