i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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