I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize