So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
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