Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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