she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
