i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
