Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
