I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
