i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
