Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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