I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize