I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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