shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
