So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize