I must be too annoying 4 u.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Boobs speak an international language.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
