i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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