Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
