I want to stick my p in your. b.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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