Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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