i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
