Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
