these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
should my penis look like a turkey
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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