Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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