i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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