Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
