Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
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