Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
