So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
