no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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