we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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