but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize