That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
