i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
