they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
